Happily Ever After.

"How is married life?"

The million dollar question people have loved to ask us when they see us since we got married almost 3 weeks ago. I believe, I can speak for both Matt and I when I say, answering this question can be more difficult to answer than some would probably assume.

I mean, it's everything really. There's this worldly presumption that we are now living the sweet life, and while marrying my best friend has been one of the best things that I've done, it's also just like all our relationships, it's work. Every morning, I wake up next to the love of my life and I remind myself of  how thankful I am of the journey and opportunities God has blessed us with. I kiss him & tell him I love him before I leave for work every morning (sometimes I'll forget and he'll whine to me about later) and smile at the fact that I can do that. We both go on about our days and some days can be horrible, but at the end of the day we get to come home to each other. If I'm not extremely exhausted, I make dinner for the three of us where we can spend a little bit of quality time together before we have to get our little one to bed. Afterwards, we get to spend a little bit of alone time stuffing our faces with ice cream and we watch our addictive shows. It may sound a little on the mundane side but it's been the best for me.

And it's not always beautiful and grand. Even in just the 3 weeks of being married, we've had our bad days where it's taken a little bit more effort and understanding to be loving & forgiving towards each other (and I'll admit, most of time I'm the one being unreasonable) but the best part about marrying Matt is the fact that he challenges me to always be better than I was yesterday. He encourages us to reflect on His word together, and talk about where we can be better for and to each other for the Glory of God. And as my life long partner, that's all I need.

So, to answer everyone's question. Married life is nothing short of amazing not because everything's been perfect. Our new lives as husband and wife has just begun and although we may not be ready for every single thing (good and bad) the world will thrown at us, our God will always be there to help us persevere.

"What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate." - Mark 10:9

Negativity, Fasting and Social Network Sites.

Negativity: "Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you." (Ephesians 4:29-32)

Fasting: “Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day” (2 Corinthians 4:16)

Social Network Sites: "I will meditate on your precepts and fix my eyes on your ways." (Psalm 119:15)

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With a thousand of things racing through my head every day, I've found myself allowing my worries, surrounding negativity, and distractions affecting my spiritual health. 

After spent time in prayer & reflection, I felt a strong conviction by the Holy Spirit to take a time out from the world. 

For the next 2 days (Saturday & Sunday), I have decided to work on the following: 

• Refocusing any and all current negative feelings, thoughts & energy towards everything God's love and all he has given me. To stop complaining and judging others.      
       "What if we as Christians started praying for others rather than putting them down or speaking evil about them to others? When we bless others, we in turn we will be blessed. It’s the law of sowing and reaping. “For whatever a man sows, that he will also reap.” (Galatians 6:7) What seed are you sowing out of your mouth, blessings or curses? What then will you harvest? As the body of Christ we should be blessing others with our mouths and not cursing or speaking badly about others. Even when it seems they deserve it, if we cannot speak blessings we should just close our mouth and pray for them."
• To not allow the negativity of others influence what I know about what is asked of me from my Lord.
         "We must also be careful of the company we keep. You may not have a problem with speaking against others. Yet, if you hang around long enough with others who have this trait, who speak and complain about others behind their backs, this same evil spirit will start affecting you. Do not be deceived: "Bad company corrupts good morals" (I Corinthians 15:33).
• To fast from food from 12:00am on 6/13 through 11:59pm on 6/14 - and use that time to regain a deeper fellowship with God.
           "By taking our eyes off the things of this world, we can turn our attention to Christ. Fasting is not a way to get God to do what we want. Fasting changes us, not God. Fasting is not a way to appear more spiritual than others. Fasting is to be done in a spirit of humility and a joyful attitude."
• To refrain from looking or using social networking websites from 6/13 at 12:00am through 6/14 at 11:59 to spend more time in prayer, study the word of God & spend more time appreciating and enjoying the world and company around me. 

Decisions like these can be difficult to make, but I have all the confidence and faith that this will be one of the best decisions I'll have made for myself. I've got God on my side & that's all I need. 

Is that a "Christian" thing?

I've quoted Christian because I feel like that can and has been interchangeable with Catholic or religion.

Matt and I have had this question asked pretty often, not just from non-believers but believers as well. Usually, pertaining to the choice we made to whole heartily follow Christ and head towards a different path with our relationship in regards to cohabiting and celibacy.

This question normally gets brought up when people realize or find out not only that Matt and I are not living together or having sex, but that we once were and are no longer. It can be a difficult question to answer, because really it's not a "Christian", "Catholic" or even a "religion" thing. It's rather a choice to honor God.

I think most people, if they reflect deep enough on how they choose to live their life, can say it revolves around honoring something or someone in some way. For the non-believers, it could be their parents and the morals/values they were taught, their occupation, their race, their family, their spouse or significant other, positive energy, themselves and the list can go on. And for those who are believers, it is or at least should be God. ("And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." - Colossians 3:17) The decisions I try to make for my life is centered around what will honor and glorify God. Now, I bold try because the world is broken and we are all imperfect, therefore not every attempt has been or will be successful. But I do not have to be ashamed of my failures, because I rely on an awesome God who redeems me, so long as I lift myself up to him. If I am to do my best to honor God with my life, my life should have a specific direction to it which will be polar opposite of the direction life was before I knew Jesus.

I'm not great with words, and often times my mind is working twice the speed of how quickly I come up with words to say, so I want to share something I came across over a year ago that struck me hard and ultimately pushed me even more to chose God over my desires of the flesh.

"Although most of the unbelieving world does not have a problem with couples living together outside of marriage, the Bible has much to say about this type of situation. God calls us to live in the world but not live like the world. Living together before marriage is commonly accepted these days but that does not mean Christians need to partake in liberal promiscuous lifestyles. Even if you were not going to partake in a sexual relationship together, others most likely would perceive that you are, and it would be damaging to your testimony and might also cause others to stumble. 

Living together outside of marriage might cause some people to think that it is okay for Christians to live together without a marriage covenant, but sex before marriage, fornication, is a sin and must be avoided. 

Marriage was instituted and designed by God. His design for relationships is at the heart of marriage, which involves companionship and intimacy, a full commitment blessed by the Lord. We must be respectful of His teachings and realize that what He commands is best for us. 

It is best to wait and live together only under the sanctity of a marriage covenant blessed by God. Be respectful of Him and honor your partner by being true to God's Word. The way we live our lives is a reflection of our true character and the depth of our devotion to the Lord and His principles. " 

It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God. - Thessalonians 4: 3-5 

Now, does all of this make me better than the next person? Saved or not, I am no way proclaiming righteousness over others. I am not any more sinless than those who don't believe or even care for God, but when I do sin I immediately repent of it, confess it to God and stop. The world is ever so changing, but God's word, commands, and promises are just as much true now than they were from the beginning.

"A Christian isn't better than a non-Christian. He's just better off. A person who has to jump out of a plane and wearing a parachute is no better than a person without a parachute. He's just better off. The difference will be seen when they jump... Jesus warned that if we 'jump' into death without Him, we would perish. " (fillthevoid.org)

Matt and I's journey to a God-centered future individually and together has been challenging, to say the least - but we joyfully continue to be sanctified in our faith knowing we have such a loving and merciful God.

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I don't know where you are in your life, no idea the struggles, sorrows or season of testing you are going through. My post might have sparked something inside you that has caused you to want to turn from sin and accept Jesus as your savior for the first time, or it could have done the complete opposite, but I want to end with this bible verse.

"We know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God, and are called according to his purpose. For God knew his people in advance, and he decided that they would conform to the image of his Son..." - James 8: 28-29

For the love of running.

Remember in elementary school when they would make you run a mile and see how fast you could run it? You know the kid that almost always finished last? Well, that kid was probably me. The chubby little Mae did not at all enjoy running, actually I hated it. 

I've been reflecting on the past year, and the journey I've been excitingly on with running, and it has been surreal. I would have never pictured myself to be that person who not only ran frequently, but to be someone who truly enjoys running. It has been an amazing outlet for me to spend some time with myself and with God. Working full time, being a full time mother to my amazing son, and preparing for my wedding in September has left me very little down time. 

When I started running back in August of 2014, my avg per mile was 14 minutes. Now? The fastest as been 9:56. Now, that is no where near as fast as some of the runners out there but it sure does feel good to see the improvement. Every run, no matter if it's a 5k or a half marathon has been such a great accomplishment. 

With that said, my motivation has been greatly influenced by my biggest fan and husband to be, Matt. He has been there at every run, pushing me and encouraging me through every process. In a world that loves to shine the light on the "stars" of the show, often leaving their supporters in the dark - Matt should be the one under that spot light. He has been my rock in all aspects of my life but most importantly in my faith. And it's because of my faith that I am able to make it through some of the harder runs I've done. 

"Keep running the race that is set before you with endurance." Hebrews 12:1

Extrovert turned Introvert.

As a little girl, I wanted to talk and interact with every person I came across. Perhaps a little too trustworthy of the world that surrounded me, but I was definitely full of high spirits. 

Unfortunately, the physical/emotional abuse I went through going into middle school and high school definitely took away my high spirited and fun loving personality. My last year of high school, being a part of my hip hop dance team sort of forced me to get out of my comfort zone & be a little bit more open again. 

Insecurities pushed me to make very poor & regretful decisions when it came to friendships and relationships - because I yearned to feel accepted, loved, cool, special etc. I allowed myself to be influenced by what was worldly acceptable just so I could feel pretty, fit in, feel included, feel love,  & accepted. Goodness, if I could only have traveled back into time and confronted myself even 5-6 years ago how wrong my way of thinking was. 

My point is - last night Matt & I went out to celebrate a friend of ours' birthday - and it made me realize how much more introverted I've become - at least in the night life aspect. The thrill of the that lifestyle has long passed me. The idea of sitting at home in front of a fire place, drinking a glass of wine or tea, reading a book just sounds so much appealing. Or even just being in community with friends and family. 

Moments like those, I feel so grateful that Jesus saved me when he did and yet also blessed for the lessons he taught through those years.

Romans 5:3-4 says "We rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope." 

I know now that God's approval is the only one who we should yearn for, and the great news is that through the work of Jesus' ultimate sacrifice - He is able to shower those who believe with an abundance of love and goodness - that you or I haven't had to work to get nor will we ever have to.